**Warning: The following Questions and Answers are selected text taken from the Fathers Rights Survival Guide. Answers provided are short statements designed only to provide a simplified and condensed answers. All questions listed have extensive additional information that cannot be stated in these brief answers. If you need more detailed information I would highly recommend the Fathers Rights Survival Guide.
Good Question! What you will probably read on other websites especially attorney and attorney referral websites is: fathers, married or unmarried, have the same basic rights as Mothers. Fathers have the legal RIGHT to file family law legal cases involving their children and property. Fathers have the legal RIGHT to access their children's medical and educational records. Fathers have the legal RIGHT to have custody and visitation with their children. Officially that is the stock answer. HOWEVER, when you get to court and stand face to face with the Judge you realize that these RIGHTS lack specific definition and are subject to tremendous subjectivity throughout ALL family law proceedings. That is where bias and inequality against fathers becomes obvious. Bottom line is: you have RIGHTS but their existence does not guarantee a specific, equal, fair and unbiased settlement and/or result.
First of all I want to debunk a HUGE myth related to family law. In 23 years of Fathers rights advocacy I have NEVER met a single pro bono or free Fathers right attorney. Never! Truth is: Pro-bono attorneys don't exist in family law. I am aware of a few women's groups that provide free legal assistance to women in domestic violence cases but I am not aware of any such group that assist Fathers. I also know that child support agencies in all states offer free legal services to Mothers in child support cases but NOT to Fathers. It has been my observation that Pro-bono attorney's are usually limited to criminal law and civil rights cases but definitely not family law. However, if you know of a free pro bono attorney that handles Fathers rights family law cases please forward me the contact information and I will be glad to post it for free on this website. The unfortunate Bottom line is: if Fathers want help they will have to pay!
Mediation is mandatory in all States. If the parties are unable to reach a parenting agreement through mediation the court will utilize its own methods of determination and ultimately make the decision for them. The courts overall focus is a standard known as the "best interest of the child" test. Once again, this test is VERY subjective and usually favors Mothers. The court may order a Guardian Ad Litem, Parenting coordinator or minors counsel to evaluate a case via a custody evaluation to determine the optimum custody and visitation arrangement. Again, these evaluations are very subjective and mostly favor mothers.
I would advise a legal search using Fathers Rights legal help or some variation. That said, be very careful with the information you get from an internet search. Not EVERYTHING that says Fathers Rights IS Fathers Rights! Although the internet has become a great source for obtaining Fathers rights legal information and related legal services it is not problem free. Among the relevant and useful information on the web is also a growing amount of bad and misleading information. Determining that which is relevant, correct and useful from the irrelevant, incorrect and unusable can be difficult. I would recommend that you search for a person known for Fathers Rights. Enter their name in the search box and check them out. Look for what they have written, articles, books, speeches, legal background, etc...etc... Check out their website thoroughly by reading everything. That should tell you if they are capable of helping you. I would also warn you NOT to leave your name and e-mail address on legal website that you are not sure about. This particularly true of websites that do not list the owner/operators name and his/her qualifications to provide such advice and assistance Many such sites claiming to be Father Rights are little more that attorney referral services and/or websites that do not provide any helpful/usable Fathers Rights information.
This is a complicated question with a number of possibilities. First, custody evaluations are expensive. ($2000.00 to $5000.00) That said, either party can request such an evaluation with the expectation they will get a more favorable custody/visitation recommendation written by the evaluator. The cost of such evaluations is usually split between the parties but in some case the judge can order one party to pay the entire amount. Custody evaluations are VERY thorough. The evaluator will speak with you alone, the Mother alone, with you and the child together and the Mother and the child together. The evaluator can and often does speak with relatives, co-workers, friends or any other person with significant knowledge of the party's relationship and background. The evaluator can even administer written psychological test to both parties. Once completed the evaluator will write a comprehensive report as to his/her findings and most importantly make a recommendation to the court as to the optimum custody and visitation arrangement. You should know that the court almost always goes along with the evaluator's recommendation.
Answer: Having your name of the child's birth certificate does NOT instantly convey parental rights. It does give you legal standing to file a court action to determine custody and visitation rights. The birth certificate alone does NOT mean you can simply go to the Mothers house and visit or take possession of the child. Having your name on the birth certificate is just the first step an unmarried Father must take to establish paternity and obtain a formal custody and visitation order from the court.
When divorcing/separating parents cannot agree on custody/visitation matters the usually turn to the court to resolve the issues. Initially the parties will allege that the other parent is "unfit". The will state a number incidents/occurrences that usually are irrelevant. "My wife/husband/GF/BF is bi-polar", "My wife/husband/GF/BF cursed at the dog when she was 16, My wife/husband drank a beer when he was 12. The big (and often untrue) allegation these days is: "my wife/husband/GF/BF) abused me." My point is parents will say ANYTHING to gain an advantage in a disputed custody case. First of all parties in a custody/visitation case must understand that the court uses the "best interest of the child" test NOT the best parent test. When the parties enter the court room the court presumes both parties are fit and proper to parent their children. So what is an unfit parent? It would have to be something very serious such as violence, sexual abuse, serious criminal conviction involving children, SERIOUS alcoholic/drug abuse issues. (Not just having a beer or glass of wine with the girls/boys) In other words if you are going to make a claim that your ex should not be around the children it needs to be very a serious issue/event/incident not just routine divorce related anger and conflict issues where one parent is simply trying to make themselves look better to the court.
When parents first separate the court can make temporary orders precluding both parents from having members of the opposite sex spend the night. They can also order that the children are to have no contact with the NEW boyfriend/girlfriend. HOWEVER, these types of order a usually short lived. (Usually only good for a few months) The court ultimately understands that the parties have a right to move on and form new relationships. Wherefore the court will not enforce these types of orders/agreements after a few months.
Mediation in all States is a prerequisite in all custody/visitation matter before the court. The parties may believe that nothing will be settled in mediation BUT statistically mediation is VERY successful nationwide. I have seen reports that say 80 to 90% of cases settle in mediation. Wherefore, it is very important for Fathers to have a well written (proposed) parenting plan before going to mediation. They should print 3 copies and take them to mediation. Give 1 to the mediator, 1 to the Mother and keep one for yourself. Some mediation tips: be courteous and soft spoken, don't interrupt either the mother or the mediator, NEVER get angry or defensive about statements made in mediation and always be reasonable and willing to consider offers of settlement. HOWEVER, if you cannot make an agreement then wait for the court date. Keep in mind that mediation is NOT a legal proceeding. The mediator does not read the case files or pleadings. He only knows what the parties say in mediation. He is ONLY there to get an agreement between the parties. If he determines that the parties cannot make an agreement then he will write a short report to the judge specifying the differences between the parties. One final note: The entire mediation process and hearing is solely based on "the best interest of the child" test. That statement needs to be included in every statement you make to the mediator. VERY important.
Generally speaking the answer is yes! However, there are some possible exceptions! First of all this question is multifaceted cannot be answered with a simple yes or no! Parental rights and parental obligations are generally linked together but can be separated in certain legal situations. If a custodial parent Mother remarries and IF step dad agrees to a step parent adoption such would transfer the parental obligation of child support to the step dad. Step parent adoption can only be facilitated IF the natural Father agrees or is deceased. However, a parent cannot simply surrender their parental rights in favor of eliminating the support obligation. There is no legal penalty attached and the court really doesn't care if a parent chooses NOT to visit their children. On the other hand if you fail to support your children as ordered by the court you will face a number of severe legal problems. I should add that there are ways to negotiate a "no contact, no support" order but that would have to be developed and agreed to between the parties.
Child support calculation is generally the same in every state. That said each state has their respective work sheet or software program that calculates the amount of support. Each party is required to contribute to the support of their children. The court considers the incomes of both parties, tax filing status, percentage of time share with children, day care and payment of medical insurance. There are other possible considerations depending on the State. The overall problem with child support calculations is the very subjective imputation and manipulation of the statewide guideline by the courts that favors Mothers.
Unfortunately broken relationships can result in domestic violence incidents. Physical abuse is NEVER ok and will impact the outcome of a custody/visitation case. Equally unfortunate is the fact that many women in an attempt to gain an advantage in a pending divorce and/or custody case will make up, embellish, exaggerate stories of abuse, acts of violence and threats to gain a legal advantage. Fake 911 calls, false police reports based on a false allegation of abuse are common today. A simple claim of a DV incident is enough to entirely derail a father's request for ANY custody/visitation. The very allegation can and often does result in 6 months of supervised visits, 12 week anger aversion class and other punitive orders. In the heat of battle an angry Mother will do and say anything that will gain her SOLE custody.
Some States have statutes stating at what age a child must be before they can testify as to which parent they prefer to live with full time. Some States don't allow children to testify at all. Most commonly though States will consider the preferences of a child when the court believes the child is of sufficient maturity and has not been coerced by a parent. Sometimes a Judge will talk with the child in his chambers but most often such determinations are done by a Guardian Ad Litem, mediator or child psychologist appointed by the court.
PAS, as it is known, is the systematic and intentional denigration of a parent by the other parent that seeks "alienate" the other parent from the affections of their child. In other words, brainwashing! The truth is: most courts believe that PAS, to varying degrees, is a part of most broken relationships and surfaces frequently during a custody fight. Today the court simply refers to this phenomenon as "high conflict relationship issues." It's very hard to stop because it's very difficult to prove! In cases where the alienation is blatant and significantly hurting the parent/child relationship that parent can file for a hearing and request a Guardian Ad Litem(GAL) be appointed to look into the matter.
When the court makes orders for custody and visitation (or any other order) it presumes that both parties will follow the orders. When one of the parties decides to NOT follow the order (s) for whatever reason, conflict arises. Sometimes there can be an honest mistake made in the interpretation of the orders. That said, if a parent intentionally disobeys a specific court order that parent could be held in contempt of court. Whether intentional or mistaken it has been my observation that most violations (especially repeated violations) of court orders are the result of a poorly written agreement and/or judgment. In which case the parents must either agree to change the language of the order to be more specific or return to court and have the Judge determine why the order was broken and make necessary changes.
The same as a married father however the unmarried father may have to take additional legal steps by filing paperwork with the court to establish paternity and obtain his parental rights. Simply signing a birth certificate does NOT necessarily confer parental rights. Once parental rights are recognized then he will need to make an agreement with the Mother on a custody and visitation schedule. If he is unable to come to an agreement he will need to file for a hearing to determine a specific parenting plan.
Both parties have the right to "move on" and form new relationships. However, the step parent has no legal right or obligation to be involved in legal matters related to the divorce and/or other case orders.
Each state requires that the moving parent notify the non-moving parent within 30 days prior to the move. (Some states are 45 days) The non-moving parent must either agree to the move and develop a new parenting plan or file for a hearing opposing the move.
Yes! A Guardian Ad Litem (GAL) is very useful to fathers in most cases. It gives him a chance to voice ALL of his concerns and provides for significant input into the creation of a fair and equitable parenting plan. Furthermore, the court almost always accepts the recommendation of a GAL.
Very good question. Technically speaking, yes but very few attorneys want to fly the Fathers rights banner. Economically it much more profitable to represent women in family law matters. Further, most attorneys that claim to support father's rights have done so ONLY for economic reasons, not because they really support father's rights issues. In fact, Just type in the attorneys name into Yahoo! or Google and see if that attorneys name is associated with ANYTHING related to father's rights. Probably not!
Family law attorneys are VERY expensive and do very little. Additionally, hiring a non-fathers' rights attorney or FAKE father rights attorney can doom your case to a point it may never really recover. The good news is: Family courts today have really advanced in the last 10 years. Most are entirely accommodating to pro per litigants. (Representing yourself) Forms, document preparation, court filing, process service, ect ect...are all easily acquired services. HOWEVER, you will need additional legal information and step by step navigation on what to say/not say, do/not do. Do a search for a REAL fathers rights advocate and allow them to direct you.
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